THE FIELD OF UNKNOWING
It has been almost ten years since I leapt off the cliff of a full time, successful corporate job in sustainability and into the wide ocean of running my own social business.
In those years, the lessons have been many and the tests of character and courage have not lessened. If anything, they have become more and more intense. Each new year brings with it new lessons, new insights and new wisdom into the nature of my personal story adventure. With the collective experience of time speeding up, it seems as though the collective social narrative, within which I am attempting to ‘hack’, also changes and presents me with new challenges and opportunities on an almost daily basis!
Each year it seems that the stories of the world grow ever louder, crying out for attention. Each year, my attention and resources feel like they are being spread thinner and thinner.
So how do I choose?
How do I know that I am walking a path of truth and integrity in regard to my personal gifts and story?
Truth be told?
At first when I began this journey, I used to try and plan everything. And I mean EVERYTHING. I would write business plans, create client forecasts, spend endless hours networking, working social media and blogging platforms and ‘doing’ something every hour of every day in an attempt to control my creative process.
Planning and organizing became my religion because I felt like this was the only way I could ensure that my newfound freedom of opportunity to make a difference paid back to those around me, especially my husband and family.
Problem was, I was lucky if barely 10% of what I planned, actually came into being. Weeks would pass without any of the promised client work manifesting, multiple unexpected opportunities landing on my plate, begging attention and surprise situations with friends, family, ancestors, angels…you name it. Pretty much nothing went accourding to my plans and actually never has.
At first this dismayed me. How was I ever to achieve anything, let alone my dreams, if I couldn’t see the way forwards? I felt as though I was drifting through shifting mists, and sometimes dense fog, only rarely catching a glimpse of the path ahead.
Then over time, I noticed a subtle shift in my perception of creation. The ‘fog’ only persisted (and in fact got thicker) when I tried to control it. On the days and weeks when I let go and surrendered to the natural flow of creation (and destruction) in my life, the veils thinned and the sunshine broke through. It was almost as if life was playing a game with me to see how much I trusted a higher story then the one I was attempting to muscle into being through the force and will alone.
Could I let go of human control?
Could I walk into each day of my life without a game plan?
Surrender. A word that has chased me throughout this lifetime.
Yogis, coaches and mystics have talked about it for centuries.
Set your intention (direction) and then allow the Universe / God / The Force / Allah etc., to create the path that leads you to its eventual fulfillment.
One deep breath. I have found that’s all it takes these days for me to let go. The out breath relaxes me into a state of Universal trust that turbo charges my creations.
This weekend I ran one of the best retreats I have ever held – why?
I let go.
I tuned in every morning and every moment to what was needed for the incredible group of souls I was working with.
I loved them all deeply with every story I told and every word that the Universe spoke through me.
I allowed myself to sit comfortably and contentedly in the foggy field of unknowing and surrendered to its inherent wisdom to bring through exactly what was needed in the moment that needed it.
How are you navigating the field of unknowing?
Still trying to forge your own path ahead?
Why not come and sit with me for a while in the fog.
Life really does always know the way.